A ‘How To’: Procrastinating during finals week

Mark Sebastion/MCT Campus

Mark Sebastion/MCT Campus

Students at Christopher Newport University are so pumped for and getting geared up for Finals Week 2013.  Should we pop the champagne now or later?  The countdown has officially begun and preparations are starting to be made for the all-nighters – the last effort to reverse the three months of slacking that has taken place, This requires our inner superhuman power to shine through out of complete and total desperation. What’s another great part of finals?  It’s becoming  a permanent fixture in the “Trib Lib,” which consequently may or may not lead to forgetting what sunshine looks like around day four. Also, if you have not done so yet, you should probably add Chanello’s number to your speed dial because there is nothing a hot and greasy Big Boy can’t fix at two a.m.

However, if you are looking for an excuse (really, any excuse will do, right?) to not study and need a little bit of inspiration, here is a list of reasons not to study.  I mean, what’s the big deal right?  It’s only our college education.

1)  Maroon 5 and Kelly Clarkson just released their summer tour dates and it is crucial to our well-being to find out the “when” and “where” A.S.A.P.  Adam Levine is a real fine man, and how can someone pass up a night with him?  Now that’s a joke.  Think about it this way.  He could pick you out from the crowd, and ask you to come backstage where you two really hit it off and you’re the one that settles down a notoriously single guy.  He would probably mention that during his proposal.  Unfortunately, I don’t know if Ms. Kelly Clarkson will be swooping any boys backstage, because 1) she is engaged and 2) she is “Miss Independent,” after all.  Either way, let’s weigh this.  Your destiny with Adam Levine or a History final?  It’s your fate we’re talking about here.

2)  The stress of finals probably has many students craving some retail therapy.  Just go to the mall.  Yeah, you should definitely do that.

3)  League of Legends is a vortex of distraction.  Juniors Quinton and Edwin said it’s video games that can really distract them.  It’s incredibly serious, incredibly distracting and incredibly time consuming.  Try having a conversation with someone in the middle of a League of Legends game.  You’re better off studying in the lunch line of Regattas on Tuesday and Thursdays around 12:21 p.m., much less attempting to study while playing an intense game of League.

4)  For some reason, during the five or six day span that is finals week, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram become exceptionally more interesting than during any of the other 359 days of the year.  So, if you are looking for the most accessible of distractions, feel free to visit your homepage.

5)  Allergy season is in full swing.  You should probably just stay in bed and wallow in self pity while rubbing your itchy, red eyes.  You wouldn’t dare step outside with the blooming flowers and trees to haul it to the library.

6)  Now maybe this is just me, but Hunter Hayes’ new single just came out, so why would I study (at all) when I could be learning every single word to his new song?  Whether you think he is the cutest, most perfect boy in the world or somewhere between a mixture of a short Jesse McCartney, an elf or a wannabe country Justin Beiber (it’s fine), you can still find something to rock out to.  If Hayes doesn’t satisfy your musical taste, you can always go to the iTunes store to see what’s just been released and jam away.

7)  Speaking of music, CNU students make up a student body of many talents, one of which including music. Senior Matt Johnston, a band member of Ara Vega, said that the desire to work on music is a distraction enough.  Hey, you can’t just quit your passion for the sake of finals week.  Let’s look at it this way.  It’s probably more of a distraction to be “studying” when all you can think about is music, instead of just not studying and doing what you actually want to be doing.  Yeah?

8)  What’s one of the best parts of going to CNU?  Well, fellow Captains, we live at the beach. We haven’t been slaving away in the gym since Florida spring break pictures went up on Facebook where friends were sure to see what we had been hiding underneath those jackets, scarves and hoodies all winter for nothing! The sun is shining, the birds are chirping and the beach is calling our names.

9)  The beer isn’t going to drink itself, right?  I don’t think I need to spell this out for you.

10) Consequently spending both Reading Days on the mend.  (See #9).

11)  Sleep –  the most scarce and sacred activity that can occur during finals week, and sleeping during the day is just so much more appealing.  You have to take what you can get.

12) Is YOLO still “in”? Either way, in the words of Drake, “You already know though, you only live once. That’s the motto, YOLO.  We ‘bout it every day, every day, every day.”  That right there, fellow Captains, is reason enough to not crack open a single textbook the entire length of finals.  Happy procrastinating!

1 comment

  1. League Points

    Nothing like playing some League of Legends as a procrastination method, I know that is the reason why I barely passed my exams this year!